A String of Pearls

HAPPY

16

That’s what my daughter has written, so far, on the small pan of Reese’s no-bake bars.

Not quite finished, she moves into position again, the tube of orange icing hovering, her hand beginning to squeeze.

“Wait, wait, wait!” I say.

She rolls her eyes up at me, her body still bent over her creation, gravity drawing a bit of icing into the tip of the tube.

“You need to put the t right by the 16.” She’s not known for precise handwriting. But this is looking pretty good so far and I don’t want her to ruin it.

“What t?” she asks.

“The t you’re about to make. For16th.”

“Hush, mom, that’s not what I’m writing.”

Not what she’s writing? Well, what could she be writing? If she wasn’t putting 16th, there was only room for one more word with, at the most, four letters. If she tried to squeeze her friend’s name into the remaining area, it wasn’t going to be pretty.

I watch, intrigued.

And here comes the icing. S then L then U then, yep, you guessed it, T.

Well planned out and nicely executed, each letter the same size and perfectly centered within the boundaries of the sides of the disposable foil pan.

HAPPY 16 SLUT. This is what my sweet daughter wrote to her best friend, who, by the way, is also a sweetheart. And neither one of them fits the description of promiscuous. A big, bold message, and, uh-oh, going to the high school with her tomorrow.

Her use of that word doesn’t bother me. It’s clearly being used as a term of endearment with no hidden innuendo. And with what kids these days are exposed to and how they could choose to incorporate it into their life, this is really quite benign. What does concern me is that this no-bake delight is going onto school grounds and that it will be in my daughter’s possession. In this day and age, the gift, with its innocuous message, could, in the least, be considered inappropriate for school and, at most, be interpreted as a form of bullying or harassment. There surely is no shortage of students who were suspended or expelled for acts where no harm was intended and the only offense that was actually committed was not thinking through the possible consequences.

“What exactly is your plan for tomorrow? Because you probably shouldn’t let any adults see that thing.” I share with her my concerns.

She’s not sure yet how she’s going to deliver the gift. But she has to take it to school because that is the only place she’ll see her friend for the next several days.

My daughter has good judgment and so, as she puts the pan into the fridge to set up overnight, I decide to trust her.

I admire this generation, these kids that are in high school. Every day I see signs of true friendship, lots of genuine hugs, and girls telling each other—clearly, sincerely, often—that they love each other. I see friends sticking by friends. I witness those who are typically included reaching out to those who are more than often not. And the overall acceptance of this generation gives me hope, while simultaneously putting my generation to shame. They’re not afraid of each other, not as easily offended, not nearly as judgmental as people my age tend to be. I believe that these young people will bring many positive changes to the world as they become adults and enter the workplace, vote, and move into positions of making policy and law.

I leave my kitchen and go into my other daughter’s room to see how her day went. Her birthday was a few weeks ago and there’s a card lying on her dresser that catches my attention.

“Can I look at this?” I inquire, as I pick it up and flip it open. It is a card from one of her friends.

“Yah, it’s hilarious. It’s from Shanda.” Shanda is one of her closest friends.

It is, indeed, a funny card. A bit inappropriate, some might say. I read the loopy handwriting inside—words of appreciation for her friendship, memories of good times and good laughs, and a statement thanking her for being a good role model and for motivating her to be a better person.

And then, in closing, Happy birthday, whore!

Yep, I have lots of faith in these sluts and whores, and their asshole counterparts as well. They’re going to do great things.